Trepidatious Stasis

Watching and waiting, apprehensive yet bored. What happens when the American political dam finally breaks?

Photo by boris misevic on Unsplash

As the 2024 election season kicks off, I’m suffused with a sense of bored anticipatory dread. It’s a strange feeling, as those emotions normally don’t belong together.

In the past, any “boredom” I’d felt about an upcoming Presidential election was accompanied by the assumption that, whichever uninspiring candidate might win, American society would essentially continue to chug along as usual.

Conversely, at the rare times when I’d felt a strong sense of “anticipation” about it, that was because I was fired up with the faith that this election could be pivotal, one that might finally make a positive and important difference.

And in the more recent past, when I’d felt a sense of “dread” about what was happening and what might be to come, it was bound up with an energizing sense of alarm. As such, it was anything but “boring,” quite the contrary.

This year, though, none of those emotional patterns — which used to seem so self-evidently logical — describe the vibe. Instead, I’m “bored” with the endless loop of Biden v. Trump even as I “anticipate” the revving up of the election cycle with a leaden sense of “dread.”

On the one hand, everything feels stuck. It’s like listening to an old-fashioned record player when the needle hits a deep scratch: Endlessly looping on skipping repeat, the sound gets more and more grating as it plays over and over and over again.

On the other hand, it feels like we’re collectively trapped on a train that appears to be headed straight off the rails. And after that — well, who knows what might happen? It’s impossible to see that far ahead.

If that day comes (and I very much hope it doesn’t), I obviously won’t be bored then.

In the meantime, though, I’m just sick and tired of being sick and tired of the whole damn thing.

I understand that not everyone shares this sentiment. Most evidently, there seems to be an enormous amount of determined energy on the part of the MAGA right. Their turnout in subzero weather for the Iowa caucus was seriously impressive.

Not being a Trumper, though, I can’t share their enthusiasm.

At the same time, since I’m no longer a #Resistance Lib, I’m not feeling the energy of the inveterate Trump haters, either. Instead, I’m stuck in suspended animation, mired in my “a pox on both their houses” anomie.

After years of questioning my progressive liberal priors, I’ve concluded that unless some promising new political movement or realignment emerges, there’s simply not going to be anything on offer I can wholeheartedly support. Meanwhile, I understand that my vote doesn’t matter, anyway: When it comes to the Presidential race, everyone knows precisely which way my true Blue city will go.

And so, it’s a winter of trepidatious stasis: A cold state of bored anticipatory dread.

Sources: CNN, New York Times